Protect Your Dignity!!!!

John Cornyn kind of looks like a dick, doesn’t he?
Don’t look now, but the people we put in charge are idiots. Republicans have the house, senate, and white house, and yet are unable to accomplish much of anything. Even the simple task of repealing and replacing Obamacare, something the GOP has been promising for 7 years and which Trump committed to once he took office, is completely stalled – with replacement options being far worse than Obamacare, and Republicans stuck between the rock of committing to eliminating Obamacare and the hard place of having nothing better to offer.

Ted Cruz promised a lot of things no one understood.
Let’s face it, most adults would be more thoughtful and responsible than those in charge now. But we don’t elect adults. We elect people who stoke our anger and rage. But stoking anger and rage to win an election is not the same skill set needed to govern.

Even state leaders, like Dan Patrick, are embarrassing.
So what to do? We are kind of stuck with these morons and losers for the time being. But at least you can protect yourself and your dignity.

Own Your Absurdity Press has a solution for you. For a mere $300 we will provide you an official “Certificate Of Dignity” that absolves you of any responsibility for the these politicians and their failure to deliver meaningful legislation.

Protect your dignity with one of our certificates .. only $300.
All your friends will want one.
Your friends and family will appreciate that you made the effort to obtain a certificate of dignity. Frame it, put it outside your front door, make a wallet size copy to carry around, put it on a bumper sticker, or even apply it to a t-shirt. Where ever you display it, you will never have to justify the irrational and absurd characters you voted for, or try to rationalize the complete failure of their policies. So be ready to order your certificate soon.